A Very Long Short Winter Vacation Break
by 1. MMBOj
Summary: NEW CHAPTER UPDATE! The divorce was actually something about a Mister Potato. But Charlene Doofenshmirtz doesn't even remember that and it was all thanks to one of her Ex's inator inventions. Cha Cha was accidentally zapped with it and ever since then, as far as she knew, it was literally like the two of them just downright out-and-out separated for entireifically no reason at all.
1. Biting the Ice

**_Thursday . January 16, 2014_**

* * *

Disney

-**_PHINEAS and FERB_**-

**_Owned by the real creators_**: Dan Povenmire and Jeff "Swampy" Marsh

So jealous. I am not them.

* * *

**...**

**Chapter Title**

Made up Title that doesn't Really Have Anything to do with this Chapter  
**_Biting the Ice, Making Snow Devils, Hell Freezing Over, and Cold Cool Inner Cores_**

**...**

The Theme Song sung by Bowling for Soup..

_There's a-_

Out of the nowhere, Doofenshmirtz swung and crashed in on a huge wrecking ball. It tore right through the memorized video of Phineas and Ferb's theme song that had started playing in this fanfiction teller's head. The now large-holed broken image of the daily rip calendar from memory began to crack all over. Bits by bits, pieces of the image flew, faded, and disappeared to the back of this girl's mind until the mad scientist on the wrecking ball was the only figure left in the blankened blackled of nothingous.

"Doof," I cried out in my head. It was kind of funny doing so. "What are you doing?"

The middle aged evil genius had his eyes shut the whole time, a big nice pleasant smile on his face as he continued to swing around, humming his evil jingle. He opened one eye and stopped humming for a moment to answer her. "Just thought I'd drop in and let you know that you were singing the wrong theme song in the Perry the Platypus chapter."

What Perry chapter?

Oh yeah. I deleted it.

But that chapter will be back up in later chapters.

He resumed his humming, slowly moving further and further to the back of her mind, zigzagging off to where the pieces of that image had disappeared too. The volume of his humming hadn't lowered much. But the echo sounded louder the further away he got before it gradually turned silent. When Heinz was completely out of site, his voice was loud and clear -because it was all still in her head, when he told her, "Don't make the same mistake, you!"

It was totally weird how I was actually sort of offended at the rude maniacal sounding laughter that came after. Wanting to get back and more, I pushed the thought of him on that wrecking ball to the front of my mind once again.

That surprised the villain. He almost lost his hold on his **evil** swing. "Hey, wha- ?" All of a sudden, the wrecking ball disappeared. Imagining that there was gravity in her mind and that he was right side up, he started to fast free moving "down" instead of heading to the back deep end depths of her mind like before.

Doctor Heinz Doofenshmirtz let out a resounding sharp cry when he realized he was falling.

Snort smiling and shaking my head, I couldn't help but to roll my eyes at this. Like for reals literally kind. I made all that up and yet I'm rolling my eyes at it all.

The darkness all around melted away at a snail's pace, turning a shade brighter by the moment until the pitch black became sky blue. A scenery from the show oozed its way into the borrowed Doofenshmirtz's new reality below.

On the hills somewhere in the Tri-State Area, Heinz saw a fancy golden house. The home belonged to Charlene Doofenshmirtz, the evil scientist's ex-wife. He, the **mad genius**, was free falling towards it fast.

It was my turn to do a wicked laugh. At him. Something about the sayings it being merrier when there's more and better when things were bigger because the bigger they are, the harder they fall.

Thinking he wasn't falling fast enough, the huge steel ball that had disappeared suddenly, reappeared just as sudden, helping him plummet to the earth at a much greater speed. She also thought that maybe Dr. D might have been having the feels of aloneness from down-falling by himself towards his doom. So around a hundred feet above Charlene's place, the not so nice girly let the much heavier, roundfully wreckageable of all things unneeded, materialized on top of him. But **only** the wrecking ball. There was no crane attached to it.

I guess the goof Doof was somehow swinging around on it while it wasn't hung on to anything.

But even so, it seemed that Doofenshmirtz still didn't think he was nose-diving fast enough. He got tired of screaming and stopped. Crossing his arms, he waited for the inevitable that he so wished was evitable. The last thing he could do before the crash was si-

**Crash**  
**Boom**  
**Bang**

**And some random cat loudfully meow-hissing.  
**It was weird because they don't own a cat and there wasn't any around at all at that time. I should know because this is all in my head and I didn't picture any cats being in this scene. The cat must have been a ninja. It had no physical form in my mind. It was very well hidden and its noise came out of the blue out of my control. Haha. Not a very great ninja, though -since it still made sounds.

Well, Doofenshmirtz tried to sigh. He didn't get the chance.

Hee-Ee-EE-eE-eeeE!  
That was my lame attempt at Candace's evil laugh.

And anyway. As much as I'd love to see him get busted by his ex-wife- in front of Vanessa too- This cannot happen. Not just yet anyway. Maybe it will in future chapters. But before we go check out "how our favorite villain is doing" after falling through the roof and three floors.. Doofenshmirtz was right about one thing. I did **nana-na**-ing to the wrong Phineas and Ferb theme song in the deleted chapter. That was the summer vacation theme song. So let me do it right this time. Here's me na-na-doing to one of the Phineas and Ferb winter vacation theme song!

A theme song sung by Bowling for Soup.

There's **..nana-nana-na-na-nana...** vacation,  
that **...na-nana-nana..** and New Year's.  
So **..na-nana-na-nana-na...** our generation,  
is **...nana-na-na-nana..** the dust clears

Like maybe...  
Building **...na nonanu na na na na..** palace  
or **..na-na...** drift that's **...na-na..** high.  
Constructing huge snow cones that reach to the moon  
or making snow angels that fly.  
Creating Northern Lights,  
Snowboarding upside-down,  
**..na nenino nu na na-na...**

Vanessa was shocked to see her old man fall through the ceiling of her room. And through the room's floor.

_That is cold._

Sh_e_ couldn't hear the fan fiction writer like her father could, but she knew the story maker-upper had something to do with what was going on with her dad.

Cool winter** ...nanana..**  
**..na-na-nana-na...**  
or ice dancing with your best friends.

Charlene was at the kitchen counter with headphones on, listening to loud music, and not knowing her ex-husband broke the floor just a few feet behind her. Haha. Not even a ground shaking was felt. It's already expected anyway that she will never see her place was ever broketed that day. _Ice dancing? _She was listening to the same song. Only it was the Bowling for Soup's version. No na-nana-ings with my voice.

As you can see, there's a whole lot of stuff to do and they're not gonna stall.

Heinz**:** _Is Perry going to be in this chapter?_

Doofenshmirtz was the only one who could hear me. He could hear me singing the right song and singing the song right.

So stick with us  
'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all!

_((The song pauses.))  
_Heinz, still crushed under the wrecking ball, _"The song's not sunged right! What do you mean "Phineas and Ferb?" This isn't their chapter, is it?"_

"Fine," I tell him. But instead of resanging the last sentence of the lyrics- or changing the names, I just nana-ed the rest of it.

_((The song resumes.))_  
**Na na na na na nanana na na na nana na na -daahhh!**

Vanessa shouted down at her mom's back. _"Mom! You should so totally bust dad for rapture scramble razing his poor slaughtered spine!"_ And her mother did not hear a word of it.

**DAH!**

**...**

**THE END**

"What!" Throwing his hands in the air in exasperation while still crushed under the huge steel ball, Doofenshmirtz asked, "What do you mean THE END? This chapter can't be over! You just started the theme song!"

"The theme song is done," I reminded him.

A small pencil eraser bounced off the back of Charlene's head and landed in front of Heinz. Charlene ignored the hit, swapping behind at her head without looking back, thinking it was only some big fly that had bumped into her.

Heinz ignored the eraser too. "Okay, I mean you just got done with the theme song. The rest of the chapter should start now. This can't be over!" He also ignored the pen that landed on the counter, missing his ex-wife by a millimeter.

I told him how I was mad at him right then and questioned, "So why not?"

"Oi, oi!" Doofenshmirtz dropped a hand and rested his elbow on the damaged floor to keep himself up. He made a fist with the other hand that was still raised in the air. "You've got to be kidding me!" Shaking his head, he slapped the raised hand down to his forehead. Then roughly dragged it down his face, extremely annoyed. The hand stopped at his chin, holding it with his thumb and pointer finger in thought. "Would it help to change your mind if I said I was sorry?"

I shrugged. "Try."

"I'm sorry," he said.

We both ignored the book that landed less than an inch behind Charlene's feet.

"Alright." I partly shook my head, half nodded, and shrugged a little all at the same time in uncertainty. "Do you mean it?"

He snorted. "I'm evil. Of course I don't mean it." He rolled his eyes and made a **_duhrrr_** face. He started organizing the pencils, pens, different shape, different colored, and different sized erasers, and the books that quickly began adding up in front of him.

I frowned. "So mean," I told him. "Yous aint forgivened!"

"Remind me to fake cry as soon as I at least feel like I can be bothered to do so." Doofenshmirtz crossed his arms and blew a raspberry.

The not-so-good-at-being-an-evil-villain evil villain blinked when he saw a shoe dive towards Charlene's head, but missed her when she dropped down to get something from inside the drawers under the counter. When his ex-wife stood back up, the shoe had already landed and was hidden from her view on the other side of the counter. She hadn't heard the thud the high heeled black shoe made because another song was playing loudly through her earphones.

The volume on her headphones must be on full blast because Heinz could hear and recognized the singing group Charlene was listening to. They were called "The Slacks" and he had hired them to appear at random times - wherever in one of his properties he was at - to sing his evil jingles. All of Doof's evil jingles were usually sung before Perry the Platypus arrived to foil his evil plans.

Anyway. The most important question right now was why did I not make the wrecking ball land on his head? Even though he wasn't that good at being evil, evil was still evil. "Whatever. Your fake sorry didn't make me change my mind or anything," I said, sticking my tongue out right back at him. I twirled some of my hair in my left hand. Not exactly sure whether if this was a lie or not, I typed with my free hand. "But I did decide to change my mind on my own. Now let's just say that by THE END, I meant it was the end of the theme song and not the chapter."

Doofenshmirtz gave me one of his smuggest know-it-all smiles. "Heh heh! You probably were going to continue this from the start anyway, weren't you? Admit it. You were only getting back at me for _trying to help you_ by telling you to not make the same mistake you did last chapter."

A shoe was dropped.

Heinz grimaced when the other pair to the shoe earlier was accidentally dropped on his head. "Ow." He gently touched his head with both hands. Since he couldn't turn to face the ceiling because of the wrecking ball still on him - and it was impossible to bend his neck all the way back to look up without the back of his pointy and hurt head hitting the steel ball, he threw a look over his shoulder instead.

I thought it was so funny that he's complaining about his head hurting. If he felt that then he should also be twisting and contorting in pain right now because he freequen just fell out of the sky and through a three story house with a three long ton steel ball landing on him. Why isn't he dying? Or dead already? Or at least squirming and struggling in agony? That's what I planned for him to do when I let him free fall down the skies of Danville. So why isn't he? Could it be that he can't feel pain now after his innards became ground beef and spine like crumbs all over a painful looking mess in his insides?

That's probably why. I mean even if this is all in my head... sometimes I just have no control over some of the things that goes on in here.

"Sorry, dad." Vanessa showed him a quick small apologetic smile before looking at him all confused and shaking her head. "I swear, it just fell out of my hand. I mean it was like I let go of it on purpose, but at the same time, it wasn't on purpose. It was as if my hand was being controlled and forced open!"

Doof looks off to the side at nothing in particular -maybe because I don't have a form in this story right now and this was all in my head. He accused me of making his daughter drop her shoe on her beloved father's head. A father who she adored **oh-**so much and never wanted getting hurt.

All I could say to that was - Ew. "So full of yourself. Don't you know that you embarrass her all the time?"

Vanessa Doofenshmirtz still wasn't quite done yet. She threw a pillow at her mom to get her attention. Not the least bit surprised, she missed.

Okay, **now** she was done.

Growling, Vanessa jumped through the big hole in her floor, landing shakily on the wrecking ball. She heard a grunt. "Oh, so now you feel that, dad? Are you saying I'm heavy? Is that it?" She saw her old man shake his head. She rolled her eyes. "Whatever," she sighed. She jumped down, almost landing on her old man. Part of the cracked and messed up floor she landed on crumbled some more under her weight. She stepped out in time, watching parts of their floor fall beneath into the blankery nothinglyfied blackled of this story teller's mind.

"Yeeaaah.." I smiled sheepishly. "I was only picturing the look of Charlene Doofenshmirtz's house and the other neighborhood homes and roads, grass, mountains, and skies. And with snow everywhere because it was winter. I wasn't really into thinking about house foundations or what was underneath the earth ground and all those other details. So there was none. Hah Ha.

Vanessa also saw her father fall.

While still stuck under the wrecking ball.

The last thing Heinz Doofenshmirtz saw was his daughter finally getting ex-wife's attention.

But right before Charlene finally turned around, everything was righted and fixed.. Exactly the way they were before the crash.

**...**

**XP **Sorry, doc H. Doof!

* * *

**Note** - xD Haha. If there are words on here that you know is just_ so off_.. yeah, it's made up.

XD Next time again. Soon.


	2. Hell Freezing Over

Last chapter Summary.  
A three long ton steel ball disappears. Doc H.D. free falls, his cry resounds. Pitch black melts away at a snail's pace, shades lighter each moment until sky blue. Scenery from the show oozes into goof Doof's new reality below. The crane-less spherefully wreckageable of things unneeded materializes above him... Heinz waits for the inevitable HE SO WISH was evitable.

**_Sunday . February 9, 2014_**

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Disney  
-**_PHINEAS and FERB_**-

**Disclaimer**: I don't own them! Noooo! _Why_?!

**Note: **Some stuff on here aren't from the show. And well duh. This is fanfiction! XD Nothing. Just saying.

**...**

**Chapter: Another whatever update.  
**

Made up Title that Kind of _does_ have Something to do with the Chapter Now  
Just kidding. Still not really. Maybe a little. But, no.

**_Making Snow Devils, Hell Freezing Over, and Cold Cool Inner Cores_**

**...**

One of the first things the evil doctor Heinz Doofenshmirtz saw when he opened his eyes was the face of his ex-wife, Charlene. There was a big picture of her framed and hung on the wall.. in what looked like the living room of a place he now knows was at the Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated building.

One by one, a singing group of four dudes called The Slacks stepped in to the room, each with a mike in hand. They all formed a single straight line, standing side by side with shoulders touching. "A one," said one dude, snapping his fingers in a beat. "And a two.." Together and in harmony they sang the evil Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated jingle.

_"Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated!"_

Heinz frowned. They had sung one of his evil jingles. Usually they only do that before Perry the Platypus comes over. _Is Perry coming over_, he wondered. But Perry only shows up whenever Doof was up to no good. The Agent P was only there to put a stop to whatever evil plan he was doing.. But he wasn't doing anything evil for the whole week starting that day.

There was a saying that Evil never rests or takes a break.. Well, forget that. He would vacation when he wanted to vacation and he was. In fact, all the other evil villains he knew of had dropped a call on the O.W.C.A, letting the animal Agency know that they were going on a vacation break to be with their fambams. There were some spending time all alone for those Forever Alone bad guys.

He heard a couple of them were only taking a few days off while a few of them were thinking of taking a month off. Heinz didn't want to be one of the outsiders. He preferred to be part of the mainstream and so decided on a week-off vacation like most of the mad science genius he knew were. The rest of the villains he knew about were taking two weeks off. He might be doing that too if this break thing worked out well.

One of the guys cleared his throat. "Um.." He cast a look at his other group members. The four were a little unnerved by Doofenshmirtz's stare.

"Explain to me why my jingle is being jingled at-" Doof glanced at the wall clock above the fireplace. "-such an unjingleable time! Why are you all jingling one of my jingles at this hour?"

"Well," a different guy started..

Doofenshmirtz interrupted, saying that he wasn't paying them anything while on his winter vacation break.

They all shook their heads. "Oh, no. Nothing like that," they promised.

Raising a hand up, Doof hurriedly told them, "Alright, alright. I don't want to hear it." He pointed at the door they came in from and with the same hand, shoo-ed them away. "Leave. Please."

And they left.

That one guy, who was about to reply, was going to tell Heinz that - even though he was on break, they would come and sing to him for free because they loved to sing. Even if they did came ONLY to sing one-liners.. Also because, well, they had nothing better to do anyway. They might be great singers, but they had no lives. They had no wives to go home to. No kids to look after. And even after saying that he wasn't going to pay them while on his vacation -actually, he hadn't been paying them at all these two months.

The second they left, Doofenshmirtz was zooming through all the nearby rooms, trying to find the nearest computer he could get a hold of.

Open. Close... for the easy swinging doors.  
Shoved open. Slammed shut.. were done to the three doors that were hard to move. Two of those doors needed fixing. One door just had so much stuff behind it, all carelessly dumped inside. It was a total mess.

He made whining sounds, stomping as noisily as he could, half hurried-dragging himself to open the next door. It felt to him like he'd been opening for forever. Like he had just opened all of the existing doors in the building- a big fat exaggerating there. Because seriously? It would take him opening all the rooms in each forty-fifth floor and still not one computer was found? It was actually only seven doors he'd opened so far. "Jeez," he growled. "One would think I know which room(s) I'd left my computers or laptops in.. I mean, I know I move them around a lot, but come on..."

Finally, the last room he opened had what he wanted- Duh, duh, duhrrr. Because had there not been any electronics with internet inside that room, that room wouldn't be the last room he opened to find what he was looking for. So in the eighth door he opened.. there was a laptop. And why the heck it was in the bathroom, he for suredly could not remember why.

Moments later, Heinz was in his room, turning on the laptop- "Great," Doof growled. It was low bat. He scanned the area for a charrr- there was no laptop charger around. He slumped, making his slouched shoulders look more hunchedbacky. Pouting, he also remembered not seeing any charger in the bathroom. "So now I have to go opening doors again," he cried.

Suddenly, a flashback of him looking for a remote in boxes full of other remotes popped into his mind. He threw his hands in the air. "Awwh! I really don't want to be going through boxes too! Not again! Sheesh! Why are my things not where they are where normal people normally have them?"

I'm guessing- actually, I know- because I'm the one who's making it happen... Looking for that charger will take him a teeny weeny tiny, itty bitty witty, toodle de la di da bit more time to find. That's should be about eleven hours.

xD So why don't we leave him be for a little -LONG while and go see what Charlene and Vanessa Doofenshmirtz are up to?

**...**

A little over half an hour of driving to get there, The Slacks arrived in front of Charlene's house. They had driven in one car on the way over. Without stepping foot outside the car and with no mikes and no cues, they simultaneously sang the *Doofenshmirtz Ex-wife's House in the Hill Somewhere* jingle.

"_Doofenshmirtz ex-wife's house in the hills somewhere -severalhourslater!_"

"Mom!" Vanessa's voice screamed out from inside the house. "Dad's evil jingle singers are singing outside our house!

The Slacks zipped rushed away out of there faster than Chuck Norris riding on a light moving at the speed of light.

The front door of the yellow golden house opened and out stepped Charlene and Vanessa. "Sweetie, I don't see any evil boy band singers out here," Charlene noted. She back stepped back into the house. Her daughter followed.

"But Mom," the teenager in black complained. Vanessa closed the door behind her. She tailed her mother as Charlene made her way to her office room on the second floor.

On the way up the stairs, Charlene wondered out loud, "You said this evil boy band was Heinz's thing or something? Why, I had no idea you and your father were into the same music." She chuckled, looking back and smiling teasingly at her only child who was glaring an unpaintable mean look right back at her. Vanessa did not appreciate her sarcasm. Obviously enough. "Hun, having something in common with your dad is not a bad thi-"

"Yeah," Vanessa cut her. "That wouldn't be a bad thing. Not at all." In the office, she watched her mom as she sat on her desk chair and started the computer. The dark haired girl crossed her arms. "It's only bad **because** you think that." She turned to leave the room. "Because dad and I really do not have anything in common." She was already at the stairs, about to descend when she heard her mother reminding her what she was supposed to be doing before those guys sang in front of their home and distracted her. Rolling her eyes and sighing, she whipped her head to one side and over a shoulder, hollered back. "Yeah, mom! I remember!"

The sixteen year old ran to the kitchen, grabbing the box on top the counter before mad dashing straight to her mother's car parked outside the garage. Getting in, she uncaringedly tossed the light box to the back seat. She took out the key that was already inside the pocket of her black snow jacket, started the car, and sped off towards her dad's purple building - shaped like Ferb Fletcher's head - at the center of Danville city.

Back in Charlene's home office, she was in the middle of writing an e-mail to her date about where they should date for their date later on their date night.

And no, it was not Sam, the man who drives the delivery van from Charitable Charities Donations. He and Miss Doofenshmirtz had been going out for several months and it was only the week before when they called it quits on their relationship. The two thought, decided, and agreed it was time to see other people. There were no hard feelings between them. Both were totslly alright with everything. Not even twenty four hours later and Sam had already found himself another lady friend to go out with while it took Cha a few days after their breakup. But it wasn't because she was grieving. She was just in no hurry - or super hurry at least anyway - to find another guy.

And it turned out that being single for four days was long enough for her. When she was super ready to be out there again, the green glasses wearing woman remembered the other night that her Ex was into internet dating and so thought, why not try it out? So she signed up for an online dating site she had no idea was one of the dating sites her ex husband had joined in.

And he was in a lot.

There was one other guy she was first message chatting with before.

The short haired thirtyseven-year-old had sent the dude a total of four different _texts_ during a private messaging between the two.

**[(Hello.)]**

**[(Tell me about yourself.)]**

**[(Oh. I'm so sorry. Not interested. I truly hope you will meet the one for you.)]**

_And I truly hope you'll be "the one" for her too_, she thought with much sarcastic fun.

**[(Bye.)]**

What Cha's problem with him was that he was not her type. But after saying bye, part of her really wished her web camera hadn't frozen and failed so she wouldn't be going out with this second guy.

But then more than half of her was so glad for the video chat failing and within the minute it started too. Or else she wouldn't have found out about him not being her type as quick as she would have wanted because she would have actually chatted with him, getting to know him. And most maybe, end up liking him.

And then she would not be going out with the guy the Internet dating site matched her with, who she was actually kinda sorta maybe she guessed after all she really was actually interested in dating.

If Charlene and the first guy did video chat then when she would have eventually figured out what type he was that she wasn't into, it would have already been a little too late. Well, too late's not exactly the right expression but she bet quite a bit (a lot) of time would be spent talking to him. From the gist she got of his answer to her question, he seemed like such an amazing guy. And after seeing his profile picture **and** the only few seconds of him during the video camera chat before it failed... he was a beauty! He had gorgeous girly eyes and a pretty boy face. His profile said he was tall. The man had a lean and fit body- he was perfect! Just like a model!

But all that was kind of the problem because if she had actually talked to him, see and hear how he was like, she could've easily ignored how something about him was a type she did not like. Charlene knew if they started dating and liking each other that she would eventually have gotten used to his looks and **maybeprobably** even with his **mightbe** awesomeness personality, **mostsurely** in the **notsodistant** future, she still would have eventually looked pass that and end up only seeing his flaw and then they would have broken up over it because it's the kind of flaw she really just can't get over after everything they **wouldhave** been through.

Even when more than half the words the handsome man replied in were in acronyms, that was still a very major **_minor_** flaw compared to this flaw that's totally just a no go for Charlene (insert random initial[s] for middle name[s]) Doofenshmirtz. It did not bother her one bit that the words not in internet slang were either being spelled wrong or were in the wrong tense... that some of the words had half while others had only less than half the letters of their complete spelling. So what if the dude messaged as if his message box was limited in characters? Or that the voice of his pages long giant paragraph he answered in were full of punctuation.. less and grammar ..less, which all made her think the guy, before moving to Danville, was taught English in his foreign country by a child foreigner totally not of his country and culture who too didn't know much English?

All those didn't matter to the richy rich rich lady. If only that flaw of his wasn't there, or at least was never known to Cha's eyes and ears, then her and her Mister couldwouldshould-havebeen Right so wouldhavebeen mightmeant to be living it very everafterfull. He would change for her and not only be Mr. Right, but Sir Write too. And she would help him. But only if he wanted to change because she wouldn't want to have forced-changed him because she "loved" him just the way he was, awesomefull at everything except writing.

But even though his writing was not a problem, the two were, still, not meant to be.

Because he had thee utmost gnarly flaw.

Ever since Charlene was little, she did not like names having the letters K, Q, and X in them. Not anywhere in anybody who was anyone's full name. Never did she ever had a clue why. Maybe there was no reason. She just didn't like names that had those letters.

And pretty faced "Aeiyqkxzouw Acegik Moq Zouwyqkxaei" had all three of them in just his first name! Also in his last name and plus in his middle names too!

Ooi.

Cracking her neck and rolling her shoulders, Cha leaned back in her seat and sighed. "Woo. Okay, that should be it." But even when saying that, she still felt like there was something she forgot to mention. She decided she'll think more about it before sending the email to her date. She really needed to go to the bathroom.

Oohs! And by the way, was it ever mentioned that her date goes by the name The **Doc**[ina]**tor**47? The obviousness of who that was was so obvious.

But if not, well, it's Heinz Doofenshmirtz!

Charlene only found out Heinz was in the same online dating site she signed up for when she saw his profile.

Ha Haha Haa!

Doctor Heinz Doofenshmirtz came up at the top of the top ten guys the site matched her with.

Yes. Charlene Doofenshmirtz was going to go out with her ex-husband.

And he doesn't know it!

She knew he could be a little slow and gullible and so.. discluefully oblivious sometimes. But this was just too- Ugh.

EyeChaChaGreenWear thought it'd be cool to say hi after seeing his profile. They private messaged each other for nearly two hours. She talked comfortably and familiarly with him as how she does normally and since he didn't realize it was Charlene, his replies sounded much less hate-like with all the "Hahah's" and smileys compared to his normal texts to her with no laughs and emoticons. It was after Heinz commenting on her picture that her makeup and hair and earrings and outfit were exactly the same as his ex-wife ..was when "Cha Cha" knew he did not recognize her.

**_D'_**evil**_OC_**[ina]**_TOR_**47:  
_Oh! ((n.n)) It's totally fine by me. Even though I loath my ex.. you dressing exactly like her won't make me hate you... Because then that would also mean I love other mad scientists who wears lab coats because I sure love me! ...Or that I would hate me too because there are other evil do-ers out there I really hate who wears lab coats like me. Ha Ha!_

She had tried a couple times telling him that she was, Charlene.

**_D'_**evil**_OC_**[ina]**_TOR_**47:  
_((o.O)) Oohwow! My ex-wife's name is Charlene too! That is so weird!_

EyeChaChaGreenWear:  
_I am your ex-wife. Heinz, it's me. Charlene._

**_D'_**evil**_OC_**[ina]**_TOR_**47:  
_Whahahaha! Oh you! You are just pulling my leg! Heheheheh!_

She gave up trying.

The next message he sent had shocked her for a split moment. But before she could ask out loud, did he really just ask me out, she answered not even a second later-

EyeChaChaGreenWear:  
_Sure_

And it took him several minutes to type back. He didn't think someone as good looking and as cool as her would say yes!

* * *

_OHCOME ON! THAT'S YOUR EX! HOW CAN YOU NOT RECOGNIZE HER?_

* * *

And during that time he didn't message anything right away from being too busy hopping and zooming around in his room in joy and disbelievement, miss four eyes here had time to think of what just happened and what she was going to do about it.

She was going on a date with him.

Because... Well ..Why not?

They'll just be talking and eating and - hopingfool - have an awesome time. She'll just not wear her glasses so there won't be any angers, arguings, and whatever other drama-ieness that might happen if she puts on her eye-wear.

She thought hard.. and she really could not remember why they divorced.

It was actually something about a Mister Potato but she doesn't even remember that and it was all thanks to one of her Ex's inator inventions. Cha Cha was accidentally zapped with it and ever since then, as far as she knew, it was literally like the two of them just downright out-and-out separated for entireifically no reason at all.

Dating her Ex wouldn't hurt anything.

It wouldn't ruin any friendships or whateverhow that sayings goes with people (mostly girls now that I thought about it) who wanted to keep the relationship status with certain others strictly in the friendzone. Cha Cha and Heinz were not friends. Only plain ex-husband and ex-wife. They were already separated and if the date goes abhorrentionally and abominably wrong, nothing would change between the two of them. Both would still have half the week spent with their daughter, she would still be giving Doof alimony checks, and he would still hate on her for all kinds of unknown reason.

The date could only make things better. If it works out, they could... Well, they might just get back together. And that was not a bad thing at all. Right?

Truthfully, she wanted to settle down again. For real. Not just dating or boyfriends. She wanted to marry again and maybe have kids. And since she was still young, she kind of wanted to make that happen before it was too late for her. But she didn't want to adopt. She was fine with just donating tons and loadsfull of stuff to charities.

Charlene didn't want a little baby with just any guy either.

And it'd be nice if her kids were both full siblings... And gosh. How funny it would be to see how long (weeks or months or years maybe) Heinz would think the two Charlenes in his life, his exwife Charlene and his maybewouldbe wife Charlene, are two different people.

DING!

She had a new message.

**_D'_**evil**_OC_**[ina]**_TOR_**47:  
_Really?! WOW! Okay!_  
_And so so sosososososo sorry for not replying right away!_  
_I spent the whole time literally jumping and running around my room!_  
_I was so happy!_

EyeChaChaGreenWear:  
_((n.n)) That's funny._

**_D'_**evil**_OC_**[ina]**_TOR_**47:  
_I did not think a veryvery very pretty lady like you would agree to go on a date with me!_  
_...Ooh. Unless you were being sarcastic or joking.._  
_xO I'm so sorry than for thinking wrong..._

EyeChaChaGreenWear:  
_No no! I will go on a date with you. I had no idea why I said yes at first. But while you were prancing about all this time... I had time to think about it. And I mean it. Let's date. How does the day after tomorrow sound to you?_

**_D'_**evil**_OC_**[ina]**_TOR_**47:  
_Weird! ...I don't mean weird weird. I mean funny weird.. It's so funny because it's perfect! The day after tomorrow is when I first start my day off from trying to take over the Tri-State Area. And then the day after that is when I have to spend time with my daughter and exwife. I hope our date goes well! We could go out on other days too! You know.. If you're not busy. So then I'll only have to spend as little time with my ex as possible. Eeeugh.  
_

Cha Cha remembered laughing so hard. He should not go saying wrong funny things like those to "strangers" - even though they're not exactly strangers. But he thinks they are because he won't believe she's his Ex, who he just dissed in front of who he's dissing herself with.. while saying he hopes their date goes well! Hilarious!

The brunette shook her head. "No wonder Vanessa thinks her father is evil. He keeps saying such silly things."

**…**

* * *

**ME**** !**  
OoOOhh! ((n3n)) Margo Carlene "Cha Cha" Gru Doofenshmirtz. . . Hahah. I hope the two will get what they want! Heeheh. Pssh. Like they have a choice. They **HAVE** to get want they want by the end of at least the next chapter. They **_cannot_** freely choose to **not** get what they want. They **WILL** get their happy ending. That's my final decision! **_xP_**

What do you think? Should their date go alright? Lol. Or would it be better if it goes abhorrentionally and abominably wrong?

I am so sorry for sounding all run-on-ie.


End file.
